Rough Draft Project 2

This is my rough draft. In it, I have the basic plan for my essay. I find an Ad in image. My instructor said I use verbal feedback I gave you to improve your essay. After I wrote this, I changed the items in yellow and a lot more add, wording, and adding verbs.  

Laandra Rochell 

Atkins

Comp 1

October 10, 2020

Quit Smoking Inspiring You

Do you have a family member or someone you care about is a smoker? Does someone you know have cancer or another disease from smoking? This a life chance that will help someone quit with some inspiration for the confident movement. Don’t let cigarette control your life, let some help from a friend or family member aid. Families are worried about their loved ones if they can’t quit while they have the chance.  The Ad lets kids inspire us to quit smoking for them. There is a woman who is smiling like she has won a battle. Her eye tells you says that look at this drawing that my son created. The woman’s skin is reflected in the light like she was shiny a little. The smile on her face will you smile to just like her to make you proud. The smile was she was proud of herself to quit smoking before it to too late. 

The woman’s son named Nick who wrote a letter to his mom. The woman is holding it up to let the audience see the picture he made for her. Nick is 11 years old that he wrote to his mother. The letter has a drawing of a man smoking and an arrow was pointing to the right shows it will kill you’re the other side of the dead man’s body is a crying child. In the letter, it says, “Thank you mom for quite I know you can do it”.

There is a program is called (CDC), but it exactly called the Centers for Disease Control and Prevention. CDC works 24/7 to help people with health, safety, and security threats. CDC helps save people’s lives and protect people from the health has high health security in its nation to accomplish was to conduct critical science, provided our nation against expensive and dangerous health threats.  CDC is responsible for controlling the introduction and the spread of infectious diseases. It detects and controls the outbreak of another disease that will cause us harm. They help us to be safe and healthy in our community from a deadly disease that harms. We respect the (CDC) to keep us from harm that will need the most important time.

Beatrice is a mother to two boys, who live in New York. She started to smoke at 7, second at 11, and smoke regularly at 13. Beatrice’s son was 11, he wrote a letter to her ask to quit smoking. Beatrice now  40, she has more energy when she was smoking. She cooks more now cause the food is more tastes better, then when she is smoking. If the audience read her story that tells about Beatrice’s life experience with smoking. So people watch the video they understand her story more.

       The message on the front is the audience to need to immediately. The message for letting your kids inspire you to quit. The message here is trying to help people that kids needed you the most. Smoking has kids that will take a toll on them if you left the world on them. That message is not alone for the adults, but kids will help you when needed to possibly. If you smoke then you end like the mon in the drawing. The man is smoking until his body can’t stand the deadly chemical and past from smoking or some say nicotine.

I have family members who are smokers to relieve stress. I don’t smoke because it is harmful to me and can cause cancer if they long-term smokers. People easily get fool by nicotine in the cigarette to think smoking is good for them. Some people smoke around their children to feel good. But kids think it cool to smoke just like their parents to feel special for just like their parents to feel special for them.

Do you what to quit smoking for your kids? ( CDC) willing to lean help with your smoking habit. The number to quit smoking is 1-800-QUIT-NOW on the bottom left of the ad.

Former smoker tells their life experiences of how smoking has changed their life forever. In the ad, the videos are shown on television they tell how they look like in the picture. When you see them in real life they look like they do not have a healthy life when they are smoking. If you don’t what to end up like them, quit smoking while you can.

   

 

 

 

Work Cited 

 

(CDC) Organization.A program helps people, unknown date, information https://www.cdc.gov/about/organization/cio.htm. Assessed 11 October. 2020.

 

 

Beatrice R. Ad. The ad to quit smoking, October 12, 2016, picture, https://www.cdc.gov/tobacco/campaign/tips/resources/ads/pdf-print-ads/beatrices-tip-print-ad-7x10.pdf. Assessed 30 September 2020.




What CDC is doing. How they help protect the U.S., unknown data, information, https://www.cdc.gov/globalhealth/what/default.htm. Assessed 15 Oct, 2020


Story of Beatrice R. Tips of a former smoker,October 12, 2016, life of a smoker,

https://www.cdc.gov/tobacco/campaign/tips/stories/beatrice.html. Assessed 11 October 2020.





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